Ch. 73 - A Clever Way to Insult

Given: A bard's upper limit depends on the strength of their teammates.

Now: The strongest teammate has vanished due to a spell.

Find: The result.

"What more can I say?"

Knowing the enemy couldn't possibly take Wolf's head for real.

Tang Qi clenched his teeth, forced to analyze the rapidly deteriorating situation. "Did he not cast Arcane Eye, or does he actually have two fourth-circle spell slots?"

Banishment, fourth-circle Abjuration school spell.  

Sends one creature you can see to a harmless demiplane where the target remains incapacitated for 1 minute. When the spell ends, they reappear in the space they vanished from.

If the target is not native to this plane, they are banished back to their home plane.

And the fact that he banished 'the only one who dealt any damage' meant one thing.

He wanted to resolve everything in front of him within this one minute.

And he still had at least two third-circle spells in hand—

If he had prepared Fireball, burning the entire camp to ash wouldn't be much of a problem.

But he hasn't done so yet.

Was it because his remaining spells all required maintaining concentration?

Aside from a few exceptionally gifted individuals, most spellcasters cannot maintain two concentrations simultaneously.

And Banishment happened to occupy one slot.

The situation might not be as dire as he imagined.

"Stop playing dead, Kuru!"

Tang Qi swept across the strings, his singing rhythm quickening due to the sudden change in circumstances. "Don't blame me for my sharp words—a dragon's descendant shouldn't be this pathetic! Don't be a coward begging for mercy—this is your chance to prove your courage to your ancestors!"

Under Tang Qi's soaring song, Kuru, who had been kneeling and kowtowing repeatedly, suddenly felt a warm current surge through his chest.

This sensation wasn't actually unfamiliar—

For the weak kobold, the sunless caverns weren't any safer than the surface.

Giant spiders lurking underground, Ochre Jellies, and those nameless beasts and earthworms had countless times plunged him and his tribe into peril...

But whenever he approached despair, he could always hear the call of that ancient ancestor.

That murmuring whisper seemed to tell him he shouldn't die yet, causing his blood to burn hot as well.

Only then was he calm enough, fearless enough.

Now that song made his blood boil again, making his narrow eyes extraordinarily clear.

Kuru straightened his knees, and a bright blue ghostly light burst from the tip of his wand.

The ice crystal he flung cut through the night, striking 'Skeleton' squarely in the chest!

"Rua!"

Kuru was about to cry out in joy when he instead noticed that at the end of the cold light, a wisp of black smoke rose before that pitch-black ribcage.

The ice crystal shattered, and frost flowers exploded in mid-air.

Clearly, even with encouragement, Kuru's current level was pitifully weak.

"You've never been to a hair salon—you don't even have any hair follicles left!"

The insult that immediately followed made 'Skeleton's' already dizzy head ache with pain.

He even realized that the hole in his forehead was bleeding profusely due to his emotional agitation.

A twisted vortex was about to surge beside him, and he hastily grabbed at the air with his empty hand, forcibly closing the planar passage—

This insult could actually affect his sanity and break his concentration!?

Was it a psychic damage spell?

Why had he never heard of this?

"Shut up!"

He flew into a rage, flipping through the pages of his book, his mouth continuously spewing foul whispers as a withered vine bent into a ring shape suddenly emerged from the pages. "Withered Leaves, Blooming Flowers!"

Tang Qi's Alertness didn't trigger, meaning the vine's target wasn't him.

The emerging vine crumbled to black ash in an instant, and 'Skeleton' scattered it with his fingers into a tent behind him—

That was the mercenaries' tent!

When the powder fell around them, the huge fern leaves in the moist soil visibly withered as if their nutrients had been drained.

They drooped their lush fronds until they shriveled.

Piercing wails suddenly echoed from within the tent.

Tang Qi didn't see a single mercenary escape.

Only a fresh green glow—symbolizing vitality and nutrients—linked back to 'Skeleton's' fingers, climbing up his arm until it reached the bloody hole in his forehead.

The writhing flesh began to close and heal, even returning to its initial smoothness.

If not for the foul blood covering his entire gaunt face, no one would think he'd been injured.

Tang Qi realized things were going badly and hastily strummed his strings: "You might as well keep your previous appearance—at least then your bald head wouldn't shine like the sun!"

"Rua!"

Ray of Frost and Tang Qi's insult arrived simultaneously, but both failed to take effect.

"Perhaps those lunatics who only use Fireball and Upcast Fireball were right...

Why didn't I spend a fortune back then to copy and memorize a Fireball scroll?"

There were certainly reasons why spells were monopolized and difficult to obtain.

But 'Skeleton' regretted his chosen path for the first time.

If he had mastered this 'most popular spell,' he wouldn't be in such a predicament now, wouldn't be dealing with such a hassle.

Three Fireballs would be enough to burn the entire camp to ash.

But now, with his concentration slot occupied, he could only choose to upcast.

Fortunately, as a scholar who studied 'necromancy,' he understood that between life and death lay an unobstructed bridge—

Magic could make people die.

It could also make people 'come alive': "Rise, my servants!"

With his whispered rampage, the tent that had been wailing moments ago suddenly erupted with intermittent "gurgling" groans.

In the dim night, Tang Qi saw two mercenaries in chainmail wielding longswords slowly shuffling out from the shadows—

By the firelight in the center of camp, he clearly saw that beneath the mercenaries' iron helms were pairs of hollow, lifeless eyes.

"So it's come to this after all."

When Tang Qi realized 'Skeleton' studied the Necromancy school, he'd already dismissed the idea of calling the mercenaries to fight together.

That was a necromancer!

The more cannon fodder, the more advantageous for him—

Now these mercenaries' corpses had been desecrated, gray-black mist even lingering on their shriveled skin, continuously corroding the flesh and exposing the ghastly white bones beneath the tissue, yet not a drop of blood could be seen.

All the 'vitality' had already flowed into 'Skeleton's' organs.

Third-circle spell, Animate Dead.

And 'Skeleton' understood clearly that the lute-playing 'hero' was too strange, possessing methods he couldn't comprehend.

With his spell slots nearly exhausted, one minute wasn't enough to annihilate the entire camp.

Then he could only accomplish his original purpose. He pointed at Catherine and issued the command:

"Capture her."

The two corpses shrieked and immediately charged toward Catherine!

Corpses animated in a necromancer's hands were even more threatening than they were in life.

Despite their pigeon-toed gait appearing utterly unsteady as they swayed, they were surprisingly swift.

When Kuru's Ray of Frost shot straight at them, it couldn't even keep up with their agile movements.

Seeing the source of the ice crystal clearly, 'Skeleton' snorted coldly and snapped his fingers.

A dull bell toll suddenly rang in Kuru's ears.

"Booong—"

The bell sound pierced his eardrums, the trembling hum intermittent, like teeth constantly chattering beside his ears, faintly mixed with shrill, bone-chilling wails...

"Rua—"

The kobold's head split with pain as he clutched his ears tightly.

Then he rolled his eyes back, whimpered, and foamed at the mouth.

He fell directly into the huge fern leaves.

"Kuru!"

Tang Qi knew well that kobold wizards were fragile with thin skin.

Who'd have thought a Toll the Dead cantrip would be enough to make him lie flatter than a zombie—

Wait, something's wrong?

He looked closer and saw the kobold beneath the fern leaves wriggling and crawling farther away...

Damn it, playing dead again!?

Clearly, Kuru figured he'd exhausted his only spell slot.

With Ray of Frost having no effect, he was ready to slip away when things looked bad—

That bell toll earlier nearly cost him half his life; he hadn't even wiped the drool from his mouth yet.

He didn't dare show his face again!

Considering he'd just encouraged Kuru only to get such meager returns in response.

Tang Qi couldn't be bothered forcing a kobold to suppress his cowardly nature.

Instead, he made up his mind and issued a command: "Anbi, take your sister somewhere far away, but don't go into the forest!"

Then he suddenly strummed his strings. "Hey!

I know what you used to look like—back then you didn't have rigor mortis—

Your hair grew thick as seaweed, not polished and shiny like now!"

'Skeleton' completely failed to understand why this damned poet cared so much about his hair.

What had baldness done to offend him?

But what was even more incomprehensible was—

He clearly knew the other party was deliberately provoking him.

Yet his brain still couldn't help but feel pain and dizziness from the stimulation.

"Shut your mouth!"

While maintaining Banishment, the white mist in his hand transformed into an illusory bone hand, wrapped in frigid air, reaching out ghastly claws toward Tang Qi. "Without the dwarf, who else can block this for you?"

He seemed utterly confident that Chill Touch would be enough to pierce his throat, making him unable to sing another verse.

But Tang Qi's Alertness didn't trigger, so he neither avoided nor dodged.

The bone claw passed directly over his shoulder and dissipated in mid-air.

"How is this possible!?"

As 'Skeleton' reeled in shock, Tang Qi continued singing:

"The wind blows past with nothing to block it, you'll never feel your scalp itch again!"

"Isn't that a good thing!?"

That's what he said, but 'Skeleton' was practically grinding his teeth as he retorted—

The lyrics seemed to sing about the benefits of baldness, but fundamentally they were still calling him bald!

Sarcasm was also a form of cursing!

He hastily glanced with his peripheral vision at the two running corpses—they had already passed Tang Qi.

And Tang Qi hadn't swung his blade to strike them down, allowing the corpses to shamble toward Catherine at the camp's edge.

Anbi's beast pupils blazed with ferocity, her sharp wolf claws positioned in front of her sister with no room left to retreat—

"Don't worry about your sister, protect yourself!"

Tang Qi issued another command, making Anbi blink strangely: "I understand!"

She didn't actually understand Tang Qi-gege's intention.

But she knew how to obey.

"Let's see how long you can keep singing!"

'Skeleton' realized his accuracy would be thrown off by his headache.

He simply snapped his fingers, making the wailing bell toll ring in Tang Qi's ears.

But although the wailing in Toll the Dead was as miserable as someone crying at a funeral beside his ear.

Tang Qi could always use a more cheerful melody and louder voice to disperse the fear it brought: "In daytime you reflect the sun's rays, at night you become the bright moon's gaze!"

"Hair nutrients being eroded is the destiny of every necromancy scholar!

It's not just me!"

If this matter wasn't mentioned, he actually didn't particularly care about being bald.

But with the song ringing out, he couldn't suppress the desire to retort more and more.

Yet while desperately maintaining Banishment with his spell slots exhausted, he discovered his cantrips seemed completely ineffective!

He realized his mistake: "The one I should have banished was that foul mouth!"

In the stalemate, he could only place his hopes on the two corpses getting their hands on her quickly—

They were already within reach!

Catherine likewise trusted Tang Qi and no longer ran around randomly.

But when danger approached, instinct made her unable to help closing her eyes tightly.

Yet those rotting, withered hands failed to grasp the young woman's shoulders as desired.

Just before they touched Catherine, a transparent spiritual light enveloped her entire body like flowing bubbles.

"..."

The two corpses made "gurgling" sounds in their throats, actually seeming to lose their target as they both froze in place.

After a moment's hesitation, they instead swung their longswords at Anbi!

But Anbi was agile enough, hastily dodging the longsword and fleeing in another direction like a running wolf, leading away the two mindless corpses.

"How could—"

'Skeleton' naturally knew the source of that spiritual light and looked at Tang Qi in shock. "How could you possibly use Sanctuary!?"

"Why should I tell you?"

Tang Qi grasped the Ring of Mutual Hearts pendant he'd just put on around his neck, feeling his mental energy drain.

He just felt it was like gradually encroaching fatigue.

But he was certain it was enough to maintain for at least one minute—

Being able to infinitely release Vicious Mockery itself already proved his mental capacity met the requirements for using first-circle spells.

It was just that a bard's spells came from musical vibrations, which were truly difficult to grasp, causing Tang Qi to still not have a single proper spell he could show off even now.

"Impossible, impossible!"

'Skeleton' glared at Tang Qi with what could only be called hatred—

He was a fourth-circle spellcaster!

After all that trouble—acting, taking a beating, exhausting his spell slots, even using his lifelong research, his proudly studied spells to animate two excellent corpses...

All just to obtain that 'perfect head.'

Now all of this had been ruined by a poet who'd only been singing the whole time?

He simply couldn't accept this result!

Yet the facts were laid out before him.

The resentment accumulated in his chest nearly made him lose concentration.

He knew he couldn't linger any longer.

Otherwise, when Banishment wore off and he was a wizard with exhausted spell slots, he'd be no different from fish on a chopping block!

Left with no choice, he could only blow a whistle—

A shrill neigh rang out as a phantom steed with a ghostly transparent body exposing its skeletal frame charged out from outside the camp.

This type of spell that took effect through 'ritual' didn't consume spell slots.

So before disguising himself as a 'hunter,' he'd prepared it outside camp early on as a means of swift escape.

But Tang Qi wasn't willing to let him leave—

Come on, they'd finally exhausted his spell slots!

If they let him escape, once he was fully prepared tomorrow and launched another surprise attack, the situation wouldn't be as easy as today.

Being able to hold the advantage now was largely due to the information gap from 'Skeleton's' ignorance about bards:

"Freely roam the seas at your leisure, you're happy to help others with pleasure—

After all, your head shines bright like a beacon's light, always guiding the path and direction right!"

But his overly hasty singing made him lose his original rhythm and pitch.

The sarcastic curse reached his ears but failed to stop 'Skeleton's' footsteps.

As he mounted his horse, he issued the final command to the two corpses:

"Stop them!"

The skeletal colt beneath him moved like a phantom, immediately galloping urgently into the forest mist.

Kuru, who'd been playing dead, saw the situation clearly and tried to use Ray of Frost to stop him.

But the wailing death knell seemed to still linger in his ears, causing the ice crystal to crash into a tree not far away.

Just then, a vortex suddenly twisted in mid-air—

"BOOM!" Stonecrusher's form fell from the vortex: "Fuck that, I free-fell for a whole damn minute!"

He cursed as he climbed up, then looked around but couldn't see the spellcaster anywhere.

In the entire clearing, only two shriveled corpses remained, both swinging swords to strike Tang Qi—

As Tang Qi deflected with his curved blade, Stonecrusher rushed forward and smashed one corpse's head with his hammer: "Where's the wizard?"

Tang Qi was busy thinking about how to catch up to 'Skeleton' later.

So his answer was brief: "I insulted him into running away."

"Shave off his goatee! You're saying you drove away a fourth-circle spellcaster just by insulting him!?"

Stonecrusher's eyes widened as he couldn't help but exclaim, "How did you insult him?"

"Using a relatively 'high'-level method of insult."

Tang Qi glanced at Stonecrusher. "You probably couldn't do it."

Stonecrusher saw where his gaze landed: "Yeah, I've always been 'low'-level at insults—"

He couldn't help retorting, "Always staring at my legs.

What the fuck is wrong with you?"

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