Ch. 114 - Maid Cafes Are a Total Racket
Is It Weird for a Guy to Apply to a Witch School?This chapter is broken. Please report this on discord.
Notes
Translator's note: Oh... Yuehan, you'r such a bad girl today.
This chapter is broken. Please report this on discord.
Translator's note: Oh... Yuehan, you'r such a bad girl today.
This was my first time stepping foot in a place like this.
Normally, I don’t even do regular cafes. The coffee is overpriced, and I’m perfectly happy with my instant mix—it’s cheap, tastes decent, and gets the job done. But today, I finally understood why these places exist.
They were for people who are out in the world, have no desire to go home yet, and desperately need a place to crash for an hour. It’s a refuge for the weary.
I approached the entrance with a mix of curiosity and pure dread.
“Welcome back, Little Master~!”
“Would Little Master like to come in and play with us today~?”
Instantly, a group of seniors dressed in elaborate maid uniforms greeted me with high-pitched enthusiasm. I had to admire them—their ability to say such cringe-worthy things with a straight face and a professional smile was nothing short of legendary.
I felt second-hand embarrassment just being addressed as "Little Master."
Honestly, just for that greeting alone, I felt socially obligated to go in and spend some money.
Fortunately, my wallet was still somewhat padded, and I could probably afford the basic tier of service.
I just hoped they wouldn't judge me for being a budget-conscious customer.
My slight hesitation only made them more aggressive with their hospitality. Before I knew it, I was being ushered inside.
This was a cat-ear-themed maid cafe. Even though "Cafe" was in the name, it was pretty clear that the coffee was secondary to the "Maid" experience.
I stood there, awkward and lost, trying to scan the menu for a price list that wouldn't give me a heart attack.
At the front desk, another cat-eared maid greeted me. She was clearly an upperclassman, but she was leaning into a "baby voice" that was so high it could probably shatter glass.
She explained the house rules in a way that made me want to curl up and die from the sheer awkwardness of it all.
The base rate was around 80 yuan per hour. The prices fluctuated depending on which "Maid" you wanted to sit with you.
During that hour, your chosen maid would hang out, mix your drinks, serve snacks, and engage in various "interactions."
Alternatively, I could just order a drink or a dessert à la carte. Those cost extra, of course. And apparently, if you were charming enough—or tipped well enough—you could get a bored maid to chat with you for free. Wink wink, nudge nudge.
I let out a small sigh of relief. The prices weren't as astronomical as I’d feared. I mean, considering the psychological damage of having to wear that outfit and act like a subservient cat-girl, I figured they’d charge a premium.
“Would you like to request a specific maid, Master? There’s a big difference between a formal booking and just tipping for service~!” The receptionist pushed a tablet toward me.
“If you have a preference, you can browse right here. I’d be happy to give you a personal introduction to any of our girls~!”
“Uh... let me see...” I swallowed my pride and took the tablet.
Alright, I thought. Let’s see if any of these girls actually fit my specific tastes. If I were going to drop 80 bucks on a "healing experience," I might as well pick someone I liked.
Still, nearly a hundred yuan an hour? That’s highway robbery. And that’s before ordering food or drinks. If you started ordering alcohol, you’d be broke by sunset. Luckily, I wasn't much of a drinker.
I scrolled through the profiles—rows upon rows of upperclassmen with various "personalities," each flashing a radiant, professional smile.
Until... my thumb stopped.
I saw a girl with a forced, pained smile and a face that was way too familiar. I took a deep breath, rubbed my eyes, and swallowed hard. I tapped on her photo to enlarge it.
Name: Dongli Yiren Rate: 60 Yuan / Hour Type: Introverted, Passive, ♂→♀ (MtF)
I stared at the screen in total shock. Then, slowly, I looked up at the cat-eared receptionist with a look of pure, unadulterated confusion.
I stared at the screen, currently in a state of profound existential crisis. I actually had to look up at the cat-eared receptionist to make sure I wasn't hallucinating.
“Oh, you have a sharp eye, Master!” the receptionist chirped, leaning into her persona. “This girl is one of our new part-timers. Today is actually her last shift before the semester starts. If you’d like to request her, I can go fetch her right away~!”
In that instant, every piece of the puzzle clicked into place. No wonder Dongli Yiren had been so tight-lipped about her "job." If I were in her shoes, I’d take this secret to my grave, too.
Sixty yuan an hour!
I didn't know how much of a cut the shop took, but for a girl as proud and prickly as Dongli Yiren to throw away her dignity and put on a pair of cat ears for cash? This gig must pay incredibly well.
As I stood there buffering, a few regulars walked in, picking their services with the casual ease of people ordering a latte. I couldn't help but marvel at my luck—my villa was apparently a sanctuary for "Hidden Talents." Everyone I lived with had some high-octane, mind-blowing secret.
“I’ll take her,” I said, pointing decisively at the photo of Dongli Yiren’s forced, awkward smile.
“Excellent~! We’ll get that arranged for you immediately. Please, come this way, Little Mistress~!”
I was ushered into the heart of the cafe. The interior was meticulously designed—it was a pink, lacy explosion of feline aesthetics. I even saw a few actual fluffy tails darting between the table legs. They really did have live cats here.
“Please have a seat here. Your exclusive maid will be with you shortly~!”
The guide led me to a window-side table. I noticed a few private booths in the back, but those were "Premium Tier" and definitely out of my budget today. I had ordered the "Dongli Yiren Basic Set," which covered some simple drinks and, more importantly, a full hour of "interaction and mini-games."
“Thanks,” I said, nodding politely.
I had to give it to them—the professionalism was top-tier. Even for someone introverted, the way these maids spoke made it easy to lose yourself in the fantasy. They didn't show a hint of shame; they were 100% committed to the role. It didn't matter if you were a loser or a weirdo in the real world—here, as long as you paid, you were a god.
I was practically vibrating with anticipation, wondering how the reunion would go.
If she ruins my mood, can I demand a refund? I wondered. I noticed her rate was twenty yuan lower than average—probably because her "shame sensors" hadn't been fully cauterized by professional training yet.
“Hello... Master... your set is here... nya...”
A moment later, a familiar voice drifted over. It lacked the smooth, rehearsed flow of the other maids; instead, it was stiff, hesitant, and dripping with "I’m only doing this so I don't starve" energy. Even the "nya" sounded like a cry for help.
I slowly turned my head, my eyes locking directly onto Dongli Yiren’s.
For a heartbeat, the air in the cafe felt like it had been flash-frozen. Dongli Yiren stood paralyzed, her hands trembling slightly as she held the tray.
Where was the arrogant, tsundere girl from the villa? In her place was a girl in a black-and-white lace uniform, wearing a pair of twitching cat-ear headbands, looking like a deer caught in high-beam headlights.
If I hadn't shown up, she probably would have successfully brainwashed herself into being a "professional maid" for the day.
But I was here. And as I watched her try to maintain her professional mask while dying inside, a truly devious grin spread across my face.
“Hi there, 'Exclusive Maid,'” I purred, my voice dripping with honeyed malice. “First time meeting you. Please... take good care of me for the next hour, okay?”