Ch. 5
I Only Care About Making Money And Not Love. I'm The Best Professional Simp!This chapter is broken. Please report this on discord.
Notes
(SHMOLL: Want WHAT?! Speak! Speak you pervert!)
This chapter is broken. Please report this on discord.
(SHMOLL: Want WHAT?! Speak! Speak you pervert!)
"You bastard..."
Lu Xing carried Song Junzhu into the bathroom.
Her body had quieted down, but her mouth hadn't, still muttering curses under her breath.
Mm.
It seems her fiancé running away really was a huge blow to her.
However, Song Junzhu's two fair, lotus-root-like arms were honestly wrapped around Lu Xing's neck, saving him a bit of effort.
"Professor Song, getting angry is bad for your health."
Lu Xing muttered to himself as he filled the bathtub with water.
He wasn't angry, though.
Where in the world was there money that was easy to earn? Even glamorous celebrities had to sell themselves a little in their early days. (TL: "Sell a little hook" is a mild euphemism for doing unsavory things or selling out for fame/money.)
The water temperature was about right.
Lu Xing stood in front of Song Junzhu, pinching the straps of her nightdress and pulling them down.
The dark-green nightdress piled up on the bathroom floor tiles.
In the blink of an eye.
A flawless, jade-like body appeared before Lu Xing.
Lu Xing glanced down, his heart as still as water.
Maintaining his principles when facing a client was part of a professional simp's professional integrity.
If the Song Junzhu before him were a normal woman, he would definitely treat her with respect.
Unfortunately.
Song Junzhu wasn't. She was a psycho with a broken brain.
"When I've earned enough money, I'll definitely find a place with beautiful mountains and clear waters, and stay far, far away from you psychos!"
Lu Xing muttered as he lifted Song Junzhu up.
At 173 cm, Song Junzhu wasn't short for a woman, but in Lu Xing's hands, she was like a little chick.
Plop. She was mercilessly tossed into the bathtub.
"Cough, cough, cough!"
"Damn it!"
Lu Xing hadn't expected Song Junzhu to be so drunk she couldn't even bathe herself?
A second before the gold-plated psycho drowned in her own bathtub, Lu Xing grabbed the smooth nape of her neck and lifted her out of the water!
The snow-capped mountains are covered in ice year-round, and the bright red berries that grow in the icy landscape are called a miracle.
(TL: Bruh)
"Wash, wash... bathe me, wash..." Professor Song couldn't even speak a complete sentence as she started ordering him around.
If Lu Xing wasn't holding the fateful nape of her neck...
The news of her drowning in the bathtub would definitely overshadow her latest academic achievements!
"Are you sure?"
Lu Xing asked again.
Song Junzhu frowned uncomfortably. "Smell... bad smell, wash, wash me!"
Lu Xing's eyes were about to roll into the back of his head.
You drink even when you know it smells bad?!
Lu Xing's gaze shifted to stare at the floor. Resigned to his fate, he picked up a loofah and began to scrub her roughly.
Smack!
As the loofah reached her lower abdomen, the dazed and drunk Professor Song rewarded Lu Xing with a slap.
Smack!
Lu Xing slapped her back without hesitation.
"Mmm..."
For the first time in her life, Song Junzhu was slapped, but she was completely unaware of it.
Her cheeks were flushed a delicate pink from the steam, and she even hummed and whimpered comfortably in the hot water-filled bathtub.
The boy, wearing cat ears and a maid outfit, had not a trace of cuteness or warmth about him.
He said calmly.
"It's stated in our agreement: no slapping the face."
Don't hit the face when you hit me.
This was one of Lu Xing's bottom lines, which was already as low as the Mariana Trench.
After roughly washing her...
Lu Xing grabbed a large bath towel, wrapped her up in it, and tossed her onto the master bedroom's large bed!
Song Junzhu felt much better after her bath. Her previously furrowed brow had smoothed out.
She looked like an exquisite doll, beautiful yet unapproachable.
Lu Xing stood by the bed, looking down at her.
He pulled out his small notebook from his pocket and flipped to Song Junzhu's page.
【Song Junzhu - Points to Note:
...
6. Before she sleeps, you must confess your love to her for ten minutes straight.
...】
Among the many points to note, Lu Xing needed to strictly adhere to every single one.
And so.
Lu Xing sat on the floor by the bed and held Song Junzhu's soft, fair hand.
He didn't care if she could hear him or not.
He just opened the "Compendium of Love Confessions" on his phone and started reading!
"I like you, you are the person I love most in my life, but you never care about me. But that's okay, I love you, and it has nothing to do with you..."
After reading for a full ten minutes, Lu Xing decisively let go of Song Junzhu's hand, muttering.
"No matter how good my teeth are, reading this stuff for too long would make them so sour they'd need fillings."
Looking at Song Junzhu, who had already entered dreamland, Lu Xing finally let out a sigh of relief.
"Today is finally over."
Among his clients, Song Junzhu paid the most, but she also had the most demands.
But it didn't matter.
SVIPs always have privileges!
Click.
Lu Xing turned off the light in the master bedroom and said softly.
"Goodnight, Professor Song."
...
Click.
The master bedroom door quietly closed.
Song Junzhu, who should have been sleeping soundly in bed, was now frowning restlessly.
She felt like she had heard something.
Was someone confessing their love to her?
Was it Lu Xing?
But why did he suddenly stop?
Song Junzhu seemed to have entered a nightmare.
She anxiously clutched the bedsheet in her hand, wanting the confession to continue.
The next second.
Her hand grasped a furry cat ear.
The beauty's brow instantly smoothed out.
She had caught Lu Xing!
Lu Xing was here with her, Lu Xing would always be with her, Lu Xing would never leave her!
These past six months had been the most fulfilling six months of her life.
Song Junzhu tightly gripped the cat ear in her hand, a happy smile gracing her lips as she sank deep into a sweet dream.
...
"Good thing my genes are good. I can still grow taller even with little sleep."
"I guess that's the only contribution those two idiot parents who gave birth to me but didn't raise me ever made."
Seeing the clock on the wall point to eleven, Lu Xing lazily lay down on the living room sofa for a quick nap.
11:30 PM.
Lu Xing's phone alarm rang shrilly on time. He instantly tumbled off the sofa.
Beep—
The call connected, and a gentle voice with a hint of sweetness came from the other end.
"Good evening."
Even though the other person couldn't see him, Lu Xing sat up straight and began to flip through his small notebook.
Recorded on it was information about this client.
Before starting any simp mission, he would always re-familiarize himself with the client's information to prevent any mix-ups.
【Liu Qingqing, Female, Age Unknown, suffers from severe insomnia】
The two had met online two years ago.
At that time, Lu Xing was working part-time as an online chat companion.
Chat companions had a public voice recording for clients to get to know their voice.
Liu Qingqing's insomnia was extremely severe.
But when she heard Lu Xing's voice, she miraculously had a good night's sleep.
From then on.
Liu Qingqing proactively contacted Lu Xing, and the two would have voice calls every Saturday and Sunday night.
As for chatting, well, it wasn't just dry conversation.
If Song Junzhu was a major psycho, then this Liu Qingqing was a minor pervert.
She would send Lu Xing scripts to read out loud, the kind where every word would be censored if posted on a website.
But it didn't matter.
Three hours of chatting each time, three thousand yuan each time.
For Lu Xing, this was no different from picking up free money.
Other than some of the lines in the scripts making his old face blush, there was no difficulty at all!
So easy!
"This time, I'm supposed to play... a domineering CEO?"
Lu Xing looked at the script Liu Qingqing had sent over, and the more he looked, the more he felt she was a minor pervert!
Yet, Liu Qingqing's voice was so gentle and sweet, you couldn't tell at all that she had such tendencies.
The call was already connected.
Lu Xing cleared his throat and, using the most perfect tone of his voice, let out a low chuckle.
"Be good. Have you been waiting long?"
The breathing on the other end hitched, and the gentle voice was laced with a faint excitement.
"I wasn't waiting long! I'm willing to wait for you!"
Lu Xing stared at the script with a blank face, but the words that came out of his mouth were incredibly lazy and unrestrained.
"Is that so? So obedient, huh? Then what kind of reward do you want?"
"I want, I want..."