Ch. 63 - The Shameless Daoist

A golden thread flowed from Ye Fan’s fingertip, slicing open the rock wall. Instantly, a faint green light shimmered, revealing the hilt of a blade. He reached out and pulled it free. A burst of green radiance filled the area, forcing him to squint.

Clang!

It was a green dagger. As it was fully drawn out, it emitted a crisp metallic hum. Green mist coiled around it; the blade was razor-sharp. Only about half a foot long, it looked like a pool of jade-green water, crystal clear and shimmering with cold energy.

Ye Fan knew this was no ordinary item. Anything sealed away by the Demon Emperor had to be extraordinary.

“Hahaha…” At that moment, a chubby Daoist with a ruddy, cheerful face flew in on a divine rainbow. Though he looked fat and round, his movements were light, like a falling leaf, and he landed without a sound. With a kindly smile, he said, “What luck! I didn’t expect to actually catch up to a sentient weapon.” Then he stretched out a hand toward Ye Fan’s dagger and said warmly, “Child, this weapon is dangerous. You can’t control it. Let this Daoist subdue it for you.”

Ye Fan had the urge to punch that rosy face. This fat Daoist was clearly playing tricks, treating him like a gullible kid. He dodged backward, but the Daoist was incredibly nimble. With a light twist of his hand, whoosh, he snatched the dagger away.

Laughing heartily, he said, “Child, I owe you a favor. Mountains turn and roads twist, next time we meet, I’ll properly thank you.”

With that, he patted his butt and shot into the sky on a divine rainbow.

“I’ll remember you, fat bastard!” Ye Fan muttered under his breath, shaking his fist at the sky. Having a sentient weapon snatched right from his hand was hard to swallow.

“I’m not that fat, just sturdy,” came the Daoist’s voice, surprisingly sharp-eared even after flying more than a hundred meters away. He turned his head, flashing a bright white grin and said cheerfully, “Next time we meet, I’ll bring you good fortune.”

Ye Fan, realizing how sharp the man’s senses were, didn’t dare say another word. He just rolled his eyes and watched the fat Daoist swagger off into the distance.

All around the Demon Emperor’s tomb, numerous sentient weapons had broken free. Radiant lights shot in every direction as countless cultivators chased after them on divine rainbows. The skies over the ancient ruins were filled with streaks of light.

Whoosh!

Only moments later, another divine rainbow shot toward Ye Fan’s location, startling him. He quickly dodged as a streak of crimson light, like a flame-cloud, darted toward a nearby rock wall and pierced into it.

Ye Fan’s heart skipped a beat. This really was his lucky day. Though that fat Daoist had just scammed him out of a dagger, another weapon had landed right before him. He glanced around to make sure no one else was nearby. With golden thread flashing at his fingertip, he sliced the rock open and unearthed a blood-colored bead. Crimson light burst forth instantly.

“Hahaha…” A loud laugh rang out again. That fat Daoist flew in from afar, grinning so wide his mouth nearly reached his ears.

“Damn it!” Ye Fan cursed, grabbing the crimson bead and turning to flee.

“We are truly fated, my young friend!” the Daoist said joyfully, landing in front of Ye Fan and blocking his path. He reached out a pudgy hand with a gentle smile. “This treasure is fated to be with me. Let me borrow it for a bit.”

“Daoist, you’re just bullying me now!” Ye Fan was furious, retreating while clutching the glowing bead. “You already took one sentient weapon from me, this one’s mine!”

“This bead is demon-born. You can’t control it. I’m doing this for your own good.” The Daoist smiled even wider, reaching out and, whoosh, snatching the bead away.

Ye Fan’s teeth itched with frustration. “Didn’t you say next time we met, you’d bring me good fortune? You already got a dagger, give the bead back!”

“Ah, but you’ve misunderstood.” The fat Daoist beamed with satisfaction, his expression shameless and full of pseudo-wisdom. “It’s precisely because we share a good karmic bond that we’ve met again. I arrived just in time to rid you of this demonic bead. I spared you a disaster, that’s the fruit of our karmic bond!”

“#￥%￥#...!!”

Ye Fan really wanted to punch him, to leave a shoe print right on that smug face. But remembering the man’s unfathomable cultivation level, he suppressed the urge.

“Amitabha bless us. Until we meet again, young friend!” the Daoist said, twisting his hips as he shot off on a divine rainbow, whoosh, gone in an instant.

“Fat bastard! I hope I never see you again in this life!” Ye Fan muttered darkly. He was fuming. This shameless Daoist really was something else.

Boom!

Far off, the five great figures struck again with their powerful weapons, breaking off another corner of the Demon Emperor’s tomb. Radiant light exploded outward as even more sentient weapons escaped. Even these mighty cultivators couldn’t stop all of them. Many weapons flew off in different directions. The surrounding cultivators beamed with joy and rushed to intercept them.

Ye Fan sat glumly atop a stone mountain, watching the divine lights scatter through the sky. He muttered, “That damn Daoist… I curse him to be robbed naked, down to his last threadbare robe!”

Whoosh!

Suddenly, a streak of violet light shot toward him, piercing into the rock wall ahead like a comet. Ye Fan’s eyes widened. He could hardly believe it, another sentient weapon had landed near him.

This was getting weird.

“There’s something about this place…” He sensed that this cliff was special. It couldn’t be coincidence, why would sentient weapons keep landing here?

This time, Ye Fan didn’t act rashly. He waited a long while and, seeing no one pass by, cautiously approached and muttered, “Please don’t let that damn Daoist show up again…”

He carefully dug into the cliff. Instantly, intoxicating violet light flowed out, illuminating his hand in a soft glow. Violet mist swirled gently, it was a violet thumb ring, surrounded by divine hues, beautiful and exquisite at a glance.

“That damn fat Daoist already stole two treasures from me. If not for him, I’d have three by now.” Ye Fan grumbled, “At least this time he didn’t find me…”

“I’m here!” As soon as Ye Fan muttered to himself, that pudgy figure appeared again, beaming with joy, wrinkles creasing his forehead, molars showing in a massive grin. “I told you, we’re fated!”

“@#￥%...” Ye Fan’s face turned green. He never expected this damn Daoist to cling to him like glue. “Who the hell is fated with you?!”

“We are truly fated,” the Daoist said earnestly, even counting on his fingers. “See? We’ve met three times in such a short span. That’s fate, it’s the will of Heaven!”

“Heaven, my ass!” Ye Fan raised a foot, wanting to kick him right in his fat butt. But again, remembering the power gap, he gritted his teeth and stepped aside, shouting toward the sky: “Sentient weapon here!”

He hurled the ring as hard as he could. He’d rather someone else take it than let this shameless Daoist get it again. Violet light tore through the sky.

But the Daoist moved far faster than his size suggested. Whoosh! He dashed forward and caught the violet jade ring before it even flew a hundred meters. Landing with a bright grin, he said, “Heaven’s will, truly Heaven’s will!”

Ye Fan nearly coughed up blood. This fat Daoist was too shameless, deliberately mocking him.

“Daoist, don’t you think you’ve gone too far?” Ye Fan’s forehead twitched with fury. “A monk should have some dignity! Don’t be so greedy!”

“I am always disciplined. External things do not tempt my heart. I keep my mind as clear as the moonlight in the sky.”

Looking at his self-righteous face, Ye Fan felt black lines forming on his forehead. “If you’re so disciplined, give me back my stuff!”

“A monk is compassionate. Because of our karmic bond, I’ve tirelessly helped you resolve three calamities. With great reluctance, I’ve used my humble body to suppress three demonic treasures.” The Daoist put on a merciful expression, like a master beyond worldly concerns, chanting, “Amitabha…”

“You damn scammer… I’m done with you!” Ye Fan growled. “Daoist, what’s your name?”

“Humble surname Duan, given name De, Duan De.”

“No wonder you’re so shameless! ‘Duan De’? More like ‘cut-off morals’, you clearly lost all your decency!”

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