Ch. 83 - The Terrifying Power Within Tan Han
Is It Weird for a Guy to Apply to a Witch School?This chapter is broken. Please report this on discord.
This chapter is broken. Please report this on discord.
After I finished explaining, Tan Han went quiet, lost in thought.
I just stood there awkwardly, watching her. Honestly, I didn’t think anything I said was deep enough to require… contemplation.
Is this the gap between me and a straight-A genius?
“…So you think meditation is linked to dreams?” she finally said. “I remember reading something about that. Some books do mention it…”
Her tone wasn’t really a question, so I had no idea how I was supposed to respond.
Awkward or not, this was still a good time to activate my Psi-vision. Maybe I couldn’t help her, but at least I’d know right away whether she succeeded or not.
I knew for sure that meditation and dreams were connected. This meditation studio sat right on a zone where “dream space” was at its most active. Everyone’s meditation space was like a small circle nested inside a much larger one. I could see it all—but I couldn’t touch it.
Unless I started meditating myself. Meditation was my doorway, my path into the dream space.
I might not be able to form the same self-contained meditation world the seniors had—but when I did meditate, the dream space I entered was far bigger. Vast, even. Much larger than theirs. And dream space and meditation space—at their core—were the same kind of thing.
My gaze shifted to Tan Han.
She wasn’t meditating yet, but I was still curious. What would she look like under Psi-vision?
Her form unfolded before me in an abstract web of information—countless streams of data about her physical body and beyond. It was overwhelming, honestly. This was never the kind of thing you want to look at. The sheer amount of information made my head throb.
Normally, I just skim. Let it all slide by so I don’t have to process it.
But the moment I focused on her… something else surfaced.
A force.
Not deep and refined like a mana core—but massive. Overwhelming. Terrifying.
When I lifted the filter that usually blocks out excess information and let Psi-vision pull in the inner world directly, Tan Han appeared like a closed flower bud on the verge of blooming—and behind her, a sky of stars. Infinite. Boundless.
I only looked for a second.
The starlight moved.
Like a galaxy waking up. And the moment it stirred, it crashed against my consciousness, flooding me, crushing me—like my very act of seeing was an offense.
Before Psi-vision automatically severed the connection, I saw only a flood of dazzling gold—blinding, devouring, violent. It didn’t just overwhelm my senses; it shut them down, as if warning me:
Do not look again.
My knees nearly buckled.
“Hey—are you okay?” Tan Han jumped up and caught me, worry sharp in her voice. “What happened?”
She didn’t get a chance to ask anything else.
From her side, the only thing she felt was a sudden, chilling sensation—like someone had stripped her soul bare. She had looked up to see my unfocused eyes staring straight through her, hollow and unblinking.
It felt like under those unfocused eyes of mine, every one of her secrets had been laid bare. For an instant, she felt an overwhelming, drowning despair.
Only when I swayed and nearly fell did that suffocating feeling fade away. She exhaled slowly, relieved.
She didn’t know what had just happened—but she knew I had definitely done something.
Some kind of spell? A scanning technique? An unknown psychic ability? Tan Han was curious. Very curious. But she didn’t ask—at least, not yet.
“Mm… I—I’m fine. Sorry. Just lost my balance for a second.” I straightened up quickly and waved it off.
Being the cause of someone else’s worry made that ten thousand yuan feel scorching hot in my hands. I was holding money I hadn’t earned yet, and the guilt sat heavily.
“It’s alright.” She nodded lightly, but then added casually, “What were you thinking about just now?”
“Ah… nothing, really.” I looked away, trying to collect myself. “Meditation isn’t something you figure out by overthinking it. You just have to try. I had to fail a bunch of times, too. In the end, meditation is basically creating your own mental space—something that’s yours.”
I said it as vaguely as possible—both because I needed time to recover, and because, honestly, she was the one with the theory background. Me explaining meditation to her felt like teaching a top student how to do long division.
It’d be better for her to just start.
“A subjective mental space…” she repeated softly. “I think I’ve seen that described before. Then tell me—do you think meditation is a mental state, or is meditation the method you use to reach that state?”
“Uh…” Her question caught me off guard.
To me, meditation was a state. But the way I used it… It was a gateway.
She noticed my hesitation and smiled a little, “It’s fine. Just say what you think. I’m not going to be misled. I have my own framework—I just want reference points.”
“…Alright.” I exhaled. “I think meditation is a state. But for me personally, meditation is the pathway to refining the thread of consciousness and strengthening my spiritual power.”
“Your interpretation is very different from mine,” she admitted. “If I didn’t already know that meditation varies for everyone, I would’ve started doubting myself.”
“Yeah…” I nodded, even though I’d only learned today that meditation differed from person to person. So my shortcut still counted as meditation—just… a very unconventional variety.
And I hadn’t lied. I truly couldn’t call what I experienced inside the dream space a “meditative state.” For me, meditation was simply my way to reach it.
“Anyway, thank you,” she said after a moment. “You were right. If I never go beyond theory, it’ll always stay theory. I need to actually try. I can’t expect to succeed on the first attempt every time.”
Once she admitted that to herself, the knot loosened. Chasing perfection on the first try was just pride—a pride without the achievements to back it.
“Thank you, Yuehan.”
“I… uh… it’s really nothing…” Being thanked twice in a row, I actually got embarrassed. I was pretty sure everything I said didn’t even qualify as an emotional pep talk—let alone wisdom.
But when I saw Tan Han close her eyes and settle into meditation, I stopped talking.
I had to admit—her execution was impressive. …Should I remind her that half the support spells in this room aren’t activated right now?
Because if she’s not using any of those, what’s the point of paying for such a high-end meditation suite?