The Adventure of a Boy with the Mind of a Middle-aged Man

The Adventure of a Boy with the Mind of a Middle-Aged Man Chapter 48

Translator/Editor: TastefulSardine

Onward, Millards

“That’s……not fair……” one of the frontline soldiers muttered while trembling at the ridiculous number of undead charging forth.

The undead consisted of the citizens from overrun cities, of course, as well as various monsters like goblins, orcs, bird monsters, and even wild animals like giant bears.

They were kicking up a cloud of dust and charged forward, creating a constant tremor in the ground. It was obvious that they outnumbered the soldiers.

“It’s impossible……” another soldier quietly screamed.

It wouldn’t have been an exaggeration to say every soldier shared that same sentiment, and the grating sound of metal on metal only served to further his statement.

“Raise your weapons!!” roared a man with black hair, a long beard, and a medium stature.

He stood next to Count Hartwig, who had volunteered to stand on the front lines, but his exasperation only frightened the soldiers.

“It doesn’t matter what our superiors are thinking! There’s only one thing we need to do: crush our enemies. That, and that alone!” he continued, but his words were in vain. Not a single soldier raised their weapon against the horde of undead trampling towards them.

The bearded man’s face warped in displeasure and he spat on the ground before saying, “So in the end, you’re all talk. Unlike those guys.”

The black-haired mercenary turned towards another group in the same division who were holding up a flag with a red phoenix.

The Scarlet Phoenix—they were mercenaries who had made their name through their repeated displays of valor in the empire. During the second Radol incident, they were branded as cowards after they threatened their employer, Viscount Dolt Magotta, and ran away from the battle to save their own asses. The Magotta territory that he governed thus capitulated without any resistance, and the empire’s army suffered huge losses.

Mercenaries were paid to become their employer’s sword. That’s the kind of existence they were. To oppose their employer’s will during the campaign was a serious breach of trust that went against the very meaning of a mercenary, regardless of their reasons. And so the mercenaries despised this shameless group and slandered them with the name, The Fools.

“T-they’re not scared?”

Each member of the Scarlet Phoenix were lined up, rank and file, holding up their swords and pikes as they gazed fiercely at the wildly charging undead with various emotions.

“Idiot. Of course they’re scared!” said an experienced female mercenary bearing a fox crest who was touted for her valor.

She brushed back her long, red hair and pointed her sword towards the sky and, with all her might, shouted, “Are you going to let yourself be protected by the Scarlet Phoenix now of all times?!! Even a childish brat can spew out empty words! You cowards who can’t even move a muscle are just in the way! Hurry up and go home to hide in your mama’s skirt or something!!”

Her thunderous voice spilled out over the battlefield.

“Fuck no!” one mercenary cried.

“We won’t let the Scarlet Phoenix keep doing as they please!” yelled another mercenary as the sentiment quickly spread throughout the vanguard of mercenaries.

“Oi, don’t just stand there. Recompose yourself, archers! You’re the crux of this battle!”

“I know! Newbies stay in the back and focus on dipping all the arrows in oil. We’ll cover those rotting bastards in arrows!”


In an instant, the mercenaries began moving to take control of the battle.

And then—.

“Lead them to that place as planned. I expect you all to fight hard!!” boomed Count Hartwig, and the vanguard of mercenaries set out in perfect coordination.

Just fifteen minutes ago, the concrete battle plans were distributed to every five-man platoon in the battalions. The plans detailed which locations were prohibited to enter as well as where and how to lead the undead.

Finally, the battle began.

Countless flaming arrows dotted the sky and rained down onto the undead, setting them ablaze. The arrows easily brought down the human-sized undead who were struck, such as the goblins, small monsters, and small animals.

However, as if to sneer at the touching endeavors of the empire’s vanguard, the undead continued to press on like an avalanche, trampling over the undead corpses.

“Shit! There’s so many. Greenhorns, fall back! You’re in the way!” said an experienced mercenary.

And as the old and experienced stepped forward, the newbie soldiers and mercenaries began to retreat. An obvious decision. They would just get in the way, after all.

“Oi, you guys fall back too!” he shouted at the group of 20 or so next to the Scarlet Phoenix who didn’t even budge at the sight of the undead surging forward. None of them were clad in armor, and instead wore foreign black robes. From their behavior, they could hardly be seen as experienced.

“Not necessary,” said the black-haired youth in the front.

As he raised his right hand towards the undead, all the other members followed suit.

“Tote’s security squad from the Millard territory, prepare to bombard—”

Right as he finished his sentence, a ridiculous number of magic circles floated into the air, changed shape, and transformed into blazing fireballs that floated in place.

“100 flame bullets, fire.”

The countless flickering fireballs all split into 100 pieces and shot forth, instantly incinerating the undead.


In the blink of an eye, they extinguished over 1000 undead. For a moment, nobody could process what had just happened as everyone, whether they were experienced soldiers or newbie ones, widened their eyes and just stared with their mouths agape.

However, as if to sneer at them, the dominoes of absurdity began to topple.

“Oi, look at that,” trembled a soldier as he focused on where he was pointing.

A silver light fanned out before the Scarlet Phoenix, instantly and completely incinerating any undead that came within several dozen meters of them.

“Oioioioii! Is that holy magic!?” yelled a blonde mercenary as an out-of-place commotion began to stir on the battlefield.

“No doubt about it. I’ve seen the Archbishop use it before. That’s holy magic.”

“Like hell it is! Then why can the Scarlet Phoenix use holy magic!? And it’s not just one or two of them, but every last one!” yelled the red-haired female mercenary as she stared at the Scarlet Phoenix, whose each and every member continued to shoot out silver light.

“L-like I’d know!”

This was the first time the veteran mercenary with a fox crest had fallen into such confusion, and her subordinates truly understood just how absurd this situation was.

“C-captain Fox, is that……” one subordinate began.

At the end of his gaze was a former rival clad in silver armor who had just finished bisecting a large bear.

“Aquidoo!!” screamed the red-haired female mercenary, but the battlefield drowned her out.

“How about it, fox? How does it feel to be overtaken by the man you had once left in the dust?” a voice sneered from behind, and Fox turned back to see a bearded man on horseback looking down at her.

“Shut up! Blaye, are you picking a fight with me[1]!?” she yelled.

“No, never. I mean, I’m not much different from you.”

The bearded man, Blaye, shrugged and shifted his sights onto Aquido, who continued to fight.

“Oi, Blaye, is that—”

“’This battle is for a fallen mercenary and a poor noble to introduce themselves to the world. The powerless won’t speak badly of you. Focus on eliminating the remnants in the corners.’ That’s what our master, Count Hartwig said.”

“T-to say that we are powerless……fucking underestimating us!!”

“I don’t think that you’re powerless. But you know, there’s always someone above you. To the monster who set up this war, our enemies, allies, and our existences are about as important as the goblins swarming over there.”

“Are you serious? We’re famous mercenaries in the empire!”

“Yeah, once you meet him you’ll understand. He’s a monster born out of this empire. I swear, the empire’s power structure will soon turn on its head.”


Fox began to object Blaye’s suggestive words, but a shriek that encompassed the entire battleground cut her off.

“Looks like the enemy’s judged that they can’t defeat us with their first group of small-fry and have thrown in their second group.”

An incomparable number of undead surged into the plains.

“What the heck, their numbers, and even their size, have increased……”

“Oi, look over there! There’s even a small dragon.”

“Don’t fuck with me!”

And with the impatient shouting of the soldiers and mercenaries, the battle embarks on the climax.

[1] She uses a masculine I here which is rarely, if ever, used by women. Not the boku that you might sometimes see, but ore.

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